Brokedown Blogger

Hi everyone! This morning, my wife alerted me that the comments function doesn't seem to be working. I'm sure that the gnomes at Blogger are working on a fix, bless their pointy little hats. Please drink a cuppa Joe, plant a flower or shrub, be patient and allow your wonderful thoughts to percolate until tomorrow when you can (hopefully) return to find everything made right once more. Sigh

What We Call the News

Are Google & Yahoo thieves for using their search abilities to create news-feeds aggregated from all the news sites? Rupert Murdoch thinks so. The Wired story I just linked to is nothing new -- we've talked about this before if you remember. That time, it was in relation to the Wall Street Journal (owned by Murdoch's News Corp) raising objections to other news sites quoting them so extensively that they were essentially re-publishing the articles from WSJ. Now Murdoch is expanding his complaint to include the search engines that display the top stories of the day from various partners and unaffiliated news sites, operating (so it is thought) within the "Fair Use" provisions of US copyright law (Title 17 USC). Because - as ever - our laws are lagging behind our cultural and technological advances this entire area is in the phantom zone. The idea that news should be a solely for-profit enterprise is certainly not a new one (far from it) but it does make you wonder what the future holds. He's not wrong. When Murdoch says that others are profiting (through their ads) from his content (which should be profiting his advertisers), he's not wrong. But the search engines are not wrong either. Collating information and presenting it in its original format and with correct attribution (and linkback) to the originators has been how the internet has operated since it's inception. That's the nature of grey areas, I suppose. So what now? I'm all for forcing people to pay for news about Michelle Obama touching the queen. Or Bill O'Reilly freaking out on some hapless intern because he doesn't understand what Sting is about to do. But not for actual news. Is "Your time is up, please deposit another $.75 to hear about the impending biochemical terrorist attack?" what's really next? Rupert seems to think it is...

"People reading news for free on the web, that's got to change..." ~ Rupert Murdoch (qtd. in Wired Magazine)

The press may be free, but the news never has been. Newspapers charge per copy as well as renting your viewing time to their advertisers (much the same way websites do), and television news programs have sponsors out the yin-yang. But access was free. Access to news has never been curtailed in this nation or restricted to those who can pay. The funny thing about this is that even if Mr. Murdoch has his way and the Wall Street Journal and Fox News stop appearing on the Google and Yahoo homepages, it won't restrict the free flow of information one iota. Information is and shall remaind free for all who seek it. Murdoch doesn't own the news (though if wishing made it so...) news is about the presentation of the "Facts as we know them". All Fox and the WSJ can lay actual claim to is the way in which they present the news. The only thing Murdoch actually can corner is the news the way his minions write it and the opinions of his staff. My personal feelings about Mr. Murdoch's journalistic ethics aside, what he's planning to charge us for access to isn't the news. Without Fox and the WSJ the internet won't starve for facts... it will simply lack content from the Wall Street Journal and Fox News. Who really loses out in that equation, I ask you?

Blockage

People ask me all the time how I deal with writer's block. And I admit that used to be a real problem for me until I developed methods of dealing with it when it happens, writing around it and generally stripping it of its power to hurt my productivity. With the caveat that I generally focus my efforts on writing mysteries, thrillers and adventure novels, here are my 7 favorite ways of dealing with blockage:

1. Kill someone. The Classic method of dealing with a roadblock in mystery writing is "Throw another body on the floor." I generally find that about 40,000 words into any book I will hit a wall that can only be solved by killing someone. Writer's block really can be murder.
2. Give 'em the finger. One of my favorite mental tricks comes from Larry Dixon in a toast he gave at a writer's party I attended some time back. "Imagine the 'Microsoft Pointer-Finger' is giving you the finger," he said. "Unless you're writing, it's sitting there just flipping you off and you can't make it stop unless you're putting words on the page."
3. Take it on the road. Sometimes what a scene needs is a new location. If I'm having trouble with a scene or series of events, it often helps to re-set the scenery. This can either entail the characters getting in a car or just moving the location of the events to a new place.
4. Send 'em to the showers. If you've written yourself into a corner, or if you're in one of those situations where the characters seem to be running away with the story and you don't know what comes next... do what comes naturally. I find that characters become more human in my head if I allow them to do human things, like use a restroom, shave, smoke, change clothes, call their parents, answer email, cook a meal... or take a shower. It adds verisimilitude, moves the scene forward and if it's too much, you can always delete it later in the rewriting and editing stages.
5. Write the next word. It sounds so simple until you're sitting there staring at the keys, being mocked by the 26 innocent-seeming letters. But you have to get the next word out there into the aether. And then the one after that and the one after that. It may be the wrong word, they all may be the wrong words, but you're writing and that ain't nothin'. Writers have a tendency to be so self-critical that if we wake up on the wrong side of the bed, nothing we do that day is going to satisfy. There's nothing wrong with that. But you have to write anyway. Get it down on the page. Rough edges can be smoothed later, just get it out there.
6. Go get a cup of coffee. Seriously. Get up out of your chair and go do something else for a bit. Get a refill, take a walk, garden, or fill out a silly online quiz your friend sent you. The longer you sit there staring at that &%$ cursor giving you the finger, the hard it can get to write the next word. Walk it off.
7. Remember the secret... There are 26 letters on your keyboard. They're the same 26 letters used by Joyce when he wrote Ulysses and by Huxley for Brave New World, Hemingway for The Sun Also Rises, and Nora Roberts for the fifteen novels she put out last year. It's all about perspective, really.

And a bonus 8th way to get over a writing drought... Write a blog post about writer's block. Now if you'll excuse me, I have pages to write before I can sleep. --- What are your tricks for dealing with Writer's Block? Or are you immune to writer's block? I want to know! Leave your tips and tricks in the comments. Photo by me (Canon Powershot A510 w/ Timer)

Very proper British zombies, I'm sure...

"So much of Austen is about the unmentionable — about using wit and good manners to cover up nasty things like sex and money. So why not have one of those unmentionable things be zombies?" -Read the Time Magazine interview with the author

This book is causing quite a stir... Does this book make your "Must Read" list? Is it a travesty, a parody or a brilliant attempt to remake a classic novel into something kids will want to read? Or is it something in between? Leave your reactions in comments!

Pages To Type joins the BEDA movement!

Young Adult author Maureen Johnson had a brainstorm in the shower that it would be a good idea to get everyone blogging more regularly by hosting an event she calls "Blog Every Day in April" aka BEDA over on the Ning! Never able to resist peer pressure -- and since he blogs almost every day anyway -- I have elected to participate. THE RULES OF BLOG EVERY DAY APRIL (BEDA) 1. Blog every day in April. THE BLOG EVERY DAY IN APRIL MANIFESTO I commit to this idea and am determined to create something EVERY DAY in April, including weekends. Every day, I will find something to say. I embrace the reality that there is always something to talk about, if you are willing to take the time to look for it. I Scott Perkins promise to blog every day in April. See you tomorrow!

Out-Liars

Reuters reports that 2 out of 3 Britons lie about what books they've read in order to appear more literate and cultured than they really are. The same study indicates that rather than George Orwell, the Brits like nothing better than curling up with a little something by JK Rowling on a cold winter's night.

"According to the survey, 65 percent of people have pretended to have read books, and of those, 42 percent singled out "1984." Next on the list came "War and Peace" by Leo Tolstoy and in third place was James Joyce's "Ulysses."

I can't find statistics on the USA but I'd wager that the numbers are similar.

There's a certain cachet to being seen as well-read but how many people really put the time in necessary to really be well-read? Maybe I'm a pessimist, but I'd wager that it's probably fewer than we'd all like it to be. Then again, a buddy of mine who went to college in Buffalo told me about a bar near the college that was called "The Library" so maybe people weren't lying... maybe they were confused.

None of this is a howling revelation about human nature, but it occurs to me to wonder why people feel the need to do this. Anyone who is on Facebook has probably been hit with the "The BBC thinks we're howling idiots because we've only read six of the following 100 books" meme in one of it's many forms. Setting aside the fact that the meme is of specious origins and ignoring the fact that it would be difficult to have graduated high school without breaking the putative "six of these books" mark, it's not hard to see how these things might lead to a bit of truth-stretching. After a quick troll through Facebook I'm inclined to give anecdotal witness that this is indeed happening on a wide scale.

People are lying about being well read.

Lying about their reading habits... to impress people! Which means it must be "cool" to be well read, right?

The first thing that strikes me about of this is the idea that there's some sort of waiting list to get into the Book Nerd clique. It certainly wasn't like that when I was in high school. Did we take over the world when I wasn't looking? That's nice. I must've missed that issue of the newsletter. We shall endeavor to be benevolent masters. Get thee to the library... no, the one with books in it!

All of that sounds a bit snobbish, and I apologize. When you rule the world, it can go to your head. Don't worry, we won't insist upon swirlies except in those cases where there's a "ticking clock" and the jock in question has refused to relinquish his lunch money to the people hurling Shakespearean insults at him.

Regardless of who rules the world I would like to encourage you to join the nerd coalition. Just remember that true nerddom isn't about knowing stuff. And it's not about glasses and pocket protectors. It's a bit about being unathletic and unpopular, though, now that we're in power, I've tabled a resolution to repeal that line of the nerdstitution. (How else are we going to explain Danica McKellar?) It is about learning and enjoying learning.

And maybe a little bit about being in a marching band.  

Joking aside, the only way to become truly, actually, honestly well-read is to read. Read anything. I don't care what it is. Read mystery novels. Read thrillers. Read adventure yarns. Read history books. Read novels with ripped bodices on the cover. Read kids books. If you don't have time to read books, read short stories. Just read.

I'm wagering that a decent percentage of you will get over the taste of your literary Happy Meals and wonder what else is out there and begin sampling the Kobe burgers and filet of the bookworld. Before you know it, you'll be a book nerd too, part of the new ruling class. It could be that you were already among us and just don't know it.

Don't lie though. Because there might be a quiz later, an entrance exam that you won't find on Facebook so I would invite you to actually improve your literacy instead of lying about it.

Just be thankful we're not making you take the math version of the test. Welcome to the Nerd World Order.

What are YOUR must-read books? What's on your "Desert Island List"? Loan us a book or ten in the comments, wouldja?! I don't enjoy reading if someone else if forcing me to do it, but in case you need a list, the ones below are worth your time...
Literature  
100 Best (English) Novels (according to Modern Library) 

100 Best (Western) Novels (according to Time Magazine)

Genre  
100 Best Mystery Novels (according to HRF Keating)
100 Best Adventure Novels (according to National Geographic)
100 Best Romance Novels (according to TheRomanceReader.com)
100 Best Books for Teenagers by the ALA (American Library Association)
1000 Sci Fi Novels "Everyone must read" (according to The Guardian)

Random thoughts on a (snowy) Wednesday

Grammar Check Dear Microsoft, The word "etcetera" means "and so forth" so please stop prompting me to insert an "and" in front of it. "And and so forth" is absurd. And redundant. And and redundant. And and and redundant. Get the picture? Thank you. That's No Moon, It's a Space Station! The US Government has perfected a SuperLaser capable of focusing a blast equivalent to that of a Hydrogen Bomb on a point roughly the size of a pencil eraser. The system works by combining several smaller beams into a focused point to replicate the effects of a nuclear explosion wihtout breaking the ABM test ban treaty. In other news: the space station we have been building to house the new laser array is encountering production difficulties and has experienced significant delays due to workforce issues, OSHA violations and the troubles with the indiginous tribes on the planet which houses our magnetic field generators. Emperor Palpatine's office reports that efforts have been redoubled ahead of the expected Rebel attack. Ok. That part's a joke. But the Super Laser is real. Honest. Artsy Fartsy If you've read "Support" you'll know that I am a potter, sculptor and dabbler in most visual arts as well as being a writer. In that spirit, I will periodically introduce to you some of the internet-accessible elements of design that tripped that tricky trigger hidden deep within the jungles of the right hemisphere of my noggin. All of that's a long buildup to telling you I think this re-think of the ubiquitous sports helmet from Canedo Studios is so cool that it defies words... The Gladiator --- Death Star II image from http://www.obh.snafu.de/~madley/starwars/Tech.html

Your Friendly Neighborhood April Fool

You have something on your screen... here, let me get that for you...

Literary & Genre Awards Watch

ITW, The International Thriller Writers association has announced the nominees for its 2009 Awards. That Jeffery Deaver's one seriously productive cat, isn't he? Two noms for Best Thriller of the year? That's a good get. BTW: I'm not an ITW member, but if you like thrillers as a genre, their website is worth checking out.